Well, our journey to meeting you started on September 8, 2007 when I married Joshua Ross Barra, my most favorite person in the world. Little did I know that we would fall more in more in love as time went on. We had an amazing wedding day celebrated with our friends and family. We knew from the beginning we wanted to be parents and so we started off on our journey right away. Our first few years of marriage were filled with lots of fun and exciting times. We enjoyed remodeling our house, traveling, and working on having a baby :).
At the end of our first year of marriage we hit a hurdle...My mom was diagnosed with breast cancer. Little did I know at the time that this would be a great motivator for us on this journey. With the prayers of many, my mom fought that ugly beast and is now in full recovery. This experience was a learning time for my entire family. We begun to appreciate the little things a little more, and it unfortunately was a wake up call for me to start appreciating how much my mom means to me. I always knew that my mom would be my go-to when I had children, and the thought of her not being there with me was terrifying! Her cancer was the push we needed to seek some extra help in having a baby, and so our medical journey and our prayer journey began.
Our journey to meeting you has been long, and without giving all the details, we have been through a lot emotionally, physically, and financially. We have angels in heaven that we have lost, but that Josh and I think about every day. I can not say that I have no regrets because there are many things I look back on and wonder, "if only I would have done/known XYZ." I know that God has a plan, and I pray every day for the strength to accept God's plan. I always wonder though when I will understand why our journey had to be so long and painful, but then Josh reminds me that everything happens for a reason and we will find out soon enough.
There were many times on this journey when I wasn't sure how it would end, even though I knew clearly what I wanted in the end...a child. There were many times I questioned my ability to be a parent, but then I remembered that is where my faith in God needs to show. This journey has taught us to be reserved when it comes to celebrating, appreciative of help, and patient with each other.
This journey has turned me into a believer of soul mates because I am not sure anyone but God could have made a more perfect match. Josh and I are complete opposites when it comes to many things, but I believe that is why we have made it through this journey and are only stronger because of it. When I wanted to quit, he called me a quiter and told me to try again...when I wanted to shut out the world, he called my bluff and told me I can't live without answering my cell phone :)...and most importantly when I couldn't stand the pain and grief anymore, he found his faith in God and reminds me daily to find my faith.
My life would not be the same with out this journey, and I thank God for the lessons, people, and experiences I have gained through this.
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